Updated: Mar 28
James P.- Meditator at Brooklyn Meditation
25 years ago, multiple sclerosis flared-up as I lay in a hospital bed in Brooklyn. I was grateful that the physical pain was gone. Yet partially paralyzed, and partially blind, comforted by the companionship of my wife, the support of visiting relatives, friends, and colleagues, I gazed upward every night, at peace and with surrender of what unknown was to come.
It’s not a pill or a one shot fix it all, kind of thing, I may or may not suspect that I would have never gotten MS if I had been trained in meditation from an early age or perhaps in school. I’m training at bklynmeditation right now, under the supervision of a great group of knowledgeable instructors in “the method”. So what happened to me twenty-five years ago, does not exist anymore. It’s a past event that has evaporated from reality, just as this essay disappears right after its read. I do live right now though, with residual damage from the disease, but also I do live in spite of it thanks to the amazing support, of my wife, family, friends, and the circumstances of nature that enabled my survival and gave me the opportunity to wrestle this disease to stay long enough to build a family and be offered the opportunity to enjoy the gift of this life.
Had I died at that time, I would have gone in peace, with a sense of not-knowing, nevertheless, fortune and spirituality were with me and stayed with me until I got to know meditation a little better. Ultimately, meditation was my ticket to the rebirth needed, to really get acquainted with a life really lived, a life in eternity. There are many paths to the universe, to eternal life, and to happiness. I was really close my entire life but I just needed a little turn in the proper direction, the right coach to help me understand the game. With bklynmeditation, and susaneim’s method, the ladder was lowered into this illusory pit, I had built around myself, and with each rung explained, I now have the opportunity to climb out one level at a time.
There are multiple factors that contribute to the development of awareness, and although my surrender 25 years ago was a peaceful one, it was not a clear, confident, one. It was sort of an, “oh well, I’m a nice person, this came my way, I am ready to go in peace”, kind of surrender. The huge, yet subtle difference with awareness is that now I understand heaven is something that is here and now, during life, while dying, and beyond. It seems that there are people that know this, and some are on their way to learning, and there are many ways of getting there. I was skimming self-help books forever, being so close, but not quite there, and bklynmeditation just happened to come by at the right time. I was just ready for it, and I am grateful, to have found it. I am thankful to all those that have made it possible, and grateful for the commitment to universe, because there is just universe. The deepest love for myself, for ourselves, and for each other is universe. It always wins, it always is, and we are always one with it.